WAL-WHACK

I just spent the last 45 minutes sitting in the " Tire and Lube" center at my local neighborhood Wal-Mart.
wow
let me say that again
WOW
It started with me needing to just get my headlight changed. Figured, hey walmarts cheap, friendly, near by. Well, they are cheap, and they are close to home, but good lord, they are NOT friendly.
First off I walk in, to find a man of, oh I dunno, about 97 years working the front desk. And thats just how long hes been working there, so if he started when he was 15, well you get the idea.
he had about 6 teeth total, 4 were molars. and had a smile that would compete with Brin Manning.
Anyhoo, I suppose he was helpful, talked my ear off about the weather, easter, and cadbury eggs. He asked for my keys and I assumed he would pass them off to one of the mullet rocking mechanics in the shop.
Assumption: DEAD WRONG
I watched this old hunched man climb into my Jeep and rev her up.
My first thought?
I hope he likes the White Stripes
I might have forgot to turn the volume down . . .oops
So i sit down to wait. Not so bad, caught up on Sandy and Jesses breakup, Kristen Stewarts "rocking" red carpet outfits, and Reese's bday trip to Ojai. Lucky betch
Two men walk in . . . Ill go ahead and form this into dialogue so you can truly understand my pain.

(names not real)

Tom: "what you thinkin about over there"
Dick: "the Jazz what else"
Tom: "oh those Jazz, we might have a chance"
Dick: "Ya, if they can beat the Lakers"
Tom: "chances are good, the lakers are in the position to get beat right now, they lost purdy bad there the other evening"
Dick: " I just cant stand those Lakers, egos and such, I say let em lose, teach em a lesson"
Tom: "I have never liked them, you know Sandra and I went to a game when the E center was still the Delta Center, rudest fans in the NBA"
Kami: " hey hey now gentleman, I can listen to a lot, but I wont sit here and let you call me rude"
Tom/Dick: " (lol) well where did you come from sweetheart?"

the rest is history
the rest is a great memory
and old man river
he fixed my light