the face. aka. the devils spawn

I have good looking friends. i mean obviously, like attracts like. sexual boys, pretty girls. when we are all together, say, shootin pool on a saturday night, we are a good looking crowd. id check us out. boys in chucks and band shirts, girls in heels and snug tops, tattoos, jukebox killing it. like for reals. its pretty sexual. but then something happens. something so terrible i cant even believe im dedicating a blog to it. something comes over this crowd, something awful, god awful and disgusting. something i call . . . THE FACE
Now the face is a tricky thing. Its origin is unknown. theres many a tall tale as to where it started. and theres the eminent fear that it will never die. so for now i deal with it. even if it makes me want to puke.
It comes in many forms. theres the "just got out of bed face"



the "im only 21 but i now look 87 face"

the "im actually really hot but now im a troll face"

the "hey you look like a cabbage patch kid face"

the "group face"

the "you should never make that face again face"

the "lets try to make it sexual face"

and my new personal fav "the unintentional face!"

this face.
this fucking disgusting face
not a day goes by that i dont see it. not just in my dreams but amongst my friends. dinner parties. the face. bbqs. the face. beer pong tourneys. the face. at home all alone. phone chimes. text message: scott barrett. the face.
beware you guys
its like waking up next to someone after a night of too much whiskey and realizing they arent as pretty as you thought, in fact maybe you thought they resembled beckham and turns out its a 35 year old black man with a pick left on your pillow. this is the face. one second youre laughing and joking the next second youre puking. the face . . .